I have been waiting for Elena to talk for so
long…remember her alien voice? I thought for sure back then she’d be “talking” so
soon…now here we are & she’s not talking how I expected she would be at
this age…
This is a list of her vocabulary that we’ve
been able to interpret:
Momma – Mami – Ma
Da-dee or Dada = Grandma – yes, she calls my
Mom “Daddy”!
Gaw-cor = Doctor
Geesh = Cookie plus uses a very similar sound
for cheese, cheek…& light, go figure
Boowa = Bubble & very similar sound for
balloon
Boo = boots – both the Dora character & the
foot wear
Eesh = teeth
Do-or = Dora
Do-or while shaking her head = she wants to
watch Toopy & Binoo
Bwu = Blue
Bwu while shaking her head = any other colour
other than blue
Buppy = up, which is strange since we never say
“uppy”!
Nayna = Raina, my aunt
Na-nee = catch all sound that can mean many
different thinks
Bwa – another catch all sound that can mean
different things
Meh = can mean “what’s that” but is also a
catch all sound with a myriad of meanings
For animals, she’ll often make the animal sound
rather than attempt the name…and the rest of her communication is made up of grunts,
gestures & jibberish. I’m not sure if she’s stringing words together,
likely she is but I only understand a word or two. She will say a word while
shaking her head meaning “not that” & she'll get frustrated if you’ve
missed the head shake & give her the thing she didn’t want. She is trying
to sing which is absolutely precious but loves most when we sing songs with
actions like Wheels on the Bus, Zoom Zoom, Itsy Bitsy Spider, etc to which she participates
animatedly. I’ve even been spared the dreaded toddler habit (so far) of “NO!”
If you recall, she use to say, “Nien!” then, “Niet” but for the most part she’ll
just shake her head. What breaks my heart is when she’ll hold my face in her hands,
looking at me pleadingly as she repeats the same sound that obviously means something
to her but I just don’t understand. Often we get by with me asking her to show
me what she means but sometimes what she’s saying isn’t showable
& she gets so frustrated…but worse than that, sometimes she gets this look
of abject defeat...it guts me!
And that’s the thing! She is SO expressive, even
with her lack of language. I can only imagine what it’ll be like when she adds
words to all that expression! Her preschool teacher said it perfectly, her
emotions are written all over her face!
I know in my heart that Elena will come around
to talking but there was that part of me that wondered, “what if?” What if
there is some issue? What if I’m hindering her in any way?
We have a wonderful program in my province,
Early Words…at Elena’s age, I was able to self refer & have Elena assessed
by a Speech Pathologist, all covered under our healthcare.
We were sent a package of assessment forms to
fill out prior to our meeting with the Speech Pathologist. The form had a
number of lists of words & we needed to mark if Elena understood them or
understood & spoke them…seeing it all out on paper like that was
interesting…she understood pretty much every word on each list…& the ones
she didn’t had more to do with not being exposed to that item than not knowing
it, words like babysitter’s name, playpen, coffee…or words we just don’t use,
like bad (I’ve avoided using that term feeling it is too negative) & owie/boo
boo, we just say hurt, cut, bump, etc…
The first thing the SP mentioned was how
surprised she was to see how expressive Elena was. Based on the paperwork, she
expected a child that would be a lot more reserved & quiet…& the longer
we were there, the more Elena became comfortable & opened up. The SP was
impressed with how well Elena had adapted to express her wants, needs &
opinions while lacking the language skills to do so.
The SP got right down on the floor to play
& interact with Elena & observed that she didn’t try to mimic in any
way which generally kids do a great deal. She also found it interesting that
instead of pointing at things & labeling them, she brings them to me &
has me identify them…basically Elena would make little to no effort to venture out
of the small cluster of sounds & words she knows to try new & different
ones…but she wants to know, Elena definitely has a thirst for knowledge.
Basically the SP diagnosed that it was entirely
fault, I was hindering her! Oh, it’s not as bad as that sounds, lol! You
see, I had decided that I would never talk baby talk to Elena…I would always
use proper words & language, plus, until very recently, Elena was rarely
with children her own age. She was left with nothing to emulate & mimic. My
language was too difficult & she just didn’t have the ability to form the
sounds needed to speak like me…
The SP explained that I (& my Mom) needed
to speak more simply to Elena. She’s not suggesting using baby talk in any way, instead just simplifying how we speak. For example, when Elena would bring me something, like a
ball, asking what’s this (Elena knows what a ball is, this is just an example)
I would respond with a full sentence, “That’s a ball” & that is too many
sounds for Elena to try to mimic so she just doesn’t. Instead I just need to
say, “Ball” pause & say it again, “Ball” & pause again then say it a
third time…there’s no need to ask her, “Can you say Ball?” or tell her, “Say
Ball”…the pause is when she can try & she will in her own time.
Another example is when we play, I would have a
running dialogue going…"Okay, let’s go play bubbles! This is so much fun! Look
at them all! Pop them! There you go! Now you blow! Wow, great blowing…” Elena
of course would understand all of this & participate excitedly…but it left
her no room to try to learn the words! The SP suggested that I dial it way back…say,
“Bubbles! Pop! Blow!” leaving lots of pauses & chances for Elena to mimic
me.
In the week since our appointment, I have
become hyper aware of how I speak to Elena & really realize that I talk to
her like I would anyone else…& I’m now making a concerted effort to speak
more simply. Already I’ve noticed a difference!! She is trying to mimic me more
& her sound repertoire seems to be expanding quickly!
Having her in preschool in September will make
a world of difference too, I am sure. She has been going to the school Fridays with my
Mom for a drop in group. I had last Friday off so got to take her
& see her interact with her friend, who talks quite a bit. It was
amazing seeing Elena attempting the words this little girl was saying!
I really just can't wait to hear what Elena has got to say! I swear, I will never complain that she is talking too much! If I do, you have my permission to slap me!
